In last week’s post, I considered what it is to be thankful, to hold that space of gratitude that is at the heart of Thanksgiving:

“Recently I came across the word “dwell” and it struck a cord with me. I looked up the word, wanting to reconsider all the meaning. One of the definitions, “to continue in a given condition or state” and the synonym “abide” stood out for me, as did the opposite or antonym, “hurry.” To dwell in the state of Thankfulness, the season of Thanks Giving is opposite of rushing to Christmas or to the next thing.”

To dwell in a state of thankfulness is to open our hearts to the abundance around us, no matter what is happening in our lives.

Yesterday, I took a walk before I started my Thanksgiving meal prep. There were still enough leaves on the trees to provide color for my holiday table. Walking my familiar route, I went through my morning prayers for my family and friends and thought of how things had changed since last Thanksgiving. Before my walk, I’d read this in my devotional Jesus Listens by Sarah Young:

“I give You thanks, regardless of my feelings and You give me Joy, regardless of my circumstances.”

Last year the holiday meal marked the “final straw,” the end of the relationship with the man I’d been dating since February. That ending had a gradual unfolding over time— it wasn’t simply his behavior around the holiday. This year, I’d prepare that meal with the man who’d come into my life in the week that followed last year’s Thanksgiving break up. I couldn’t see then how things were unfolding, one relationship clearing out to make room for another that was much better.

This year I experienced Joy.

Today, I gradually started putting away my autumn decorations in preparation for the ones for Christmas. This is a time of transition between the two seasons, a time to eat leftover turkey and cornbread dressing, to finish off the pumpkin pie. All of the autumn decorations have been purchased since my divorce, the building of my new life in the townhouse I bought two years ago. Remembering that move that started on Thanksgiving weekend is another memory of a time of growth.

Now, I look forward to making new Christmas memories and honoring those that I’ve had–like making gingerbread cookies with my grandsons. My Christmas decorations will have a mix of the old and the new; the old ones are a reminder that in the marriage and family life I had for forty years, many good memories remain. I’ve been fortunate that I continue to have close ties with the Riddle family and am continually grateful for my brother-in-laws’ words when their older brother and I separated: “You will always be our sister.”

Later, I would realize that while I’d lost my marriage, I had not lost my family. David and I partnered well in being parents, and continue to do that now with our sons as well as our grandsons. I’m grateful that we’re able to navigate the holidays without the turmoil that many divorced families experience. Things are very different, but we continue to be a family.

As you transition from Thanksgiving to Christmas, from autumn to winter, I hope that you’ll continue to feel thankful for all that is your life and find joy along your journey.

Best to You,

Connie